A FEW THINGS REALLY . . .

'Facebook's Next Top Models'

It's Come To My Attention That Everyone Who's Anyone Believes Tyra Banks Types In Bare Random Names Into Facebook On A Regs And Recruits Those She Believes Have The Potential To Pose For Vogue . . .

All From One Single PROFILE PICTURE .

WRONG .

Tyra Banks Is A Prick . . .

YOU However Are A Slut .

I Thought After BEBO The Days Of Getting Ribcages Out In Profile Pictures Were Dead ?!

SADLY NOT .

Girls Are Still Putting On There Best Pout, Wearing There Tightest Top And Sucking There Stomachs In . . .
All To Get A Friend Request From A 'Good Looking Person' They DON'T Know .

DICKHEADS .

***

'I Declare My Love For . . . '

Whilst I'm On A Facebook Hype Might As Well Comment Again On The Percentage Of Girls Who Feel It's Necessary To Write An Essay Of A Status Telling There 48 Friends How . . .

'Amazing Hubby Is'

'He's My Rock Forever And Always'

'Life Is So Perfect'

'If I Didn't Have Him My Life Would Be Over'

. . . Kill Yourself Innit

*Vomits Blood

There's Nothing Wrong With Love It's A Beautiful Thing Cliche . . . ETC . . .

But When You Constantly Boast On How Life Is Perfect, Hubby Is Perfect It Is Actually Time To Get Married, Have Babies, Move To A Farm And Shut The Fuck Up Or . . .

Actually SHUT THE FUCK UP .

Please Note : NOT A Hater, NO I'm Not Bitter . . .

But There Comes A Point Where Your So Called 'Happiness' Jars My Life

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And Finally . . .

It's My Favourite Time Of The Year !

And I'm STILL Being Sold Mistletoe Left, Right And Centre . . .

Your Spoiling It, You Really Are .

How Many Times Do I Have To Say :

'I Don't Need No Plant Or Bush To Enhance A Lipsin' Ting ?!'

Why Are You Not Getting It ?!

'C'Mon Love £2.50 For A Bunch Tis The Season To Be Jolly And All'

It's Also The Season For Cold Sores And Swine Flu . . .

NO THANKS IT'S NOT THAT TIME .
I Leave You With This . . .

If You Can Sort It I'd Very Much Like This Man And His Friend For Christmas .

Thanks .